Nothingness

This place living in nothing is like my end,
my death,
and yet I truly feel it is more like the agony of my personality being a nothingness.
It is a place I need to make a leap of faith,
leaving my identity,
allowing myself to be nothing.
The act of faith is to believe this nothingness can reveal itself as something.

Faith moving through my being nothing
is finding God within nothingness.
There is no fabrication or story here.
It often times feels like I am walking off the edge of the earth
and is taking a faith to counteract the terror and despair.
This state of emptiness is even paradoxical
and is with Divine awareness.
The expression of the Divine in my nothingness is like an oyster,
filtering all my experiences into the identification with a Pearl,
an Essential Self.

This nothingness is an opening to a hidden depth.
This depth is learning to transcend self-consciousness
and is more of a spontaneous quality.
There is no putting on a mask.
I still have my places where my identity is centered on me,
yet there seems to be a greater awe,
a personal presence toward Being.
To have become aware of Being
is the rich delight of Being in the other.

This is rich,
the Divine shining in the other,
communicating a unique otherness,
as well as the otherness of everything.
There is a Pearl in my nothingness,
communicating everyone is valuable
because they are individuals.
The essential
recognizing the Essential Self in the other.

The more I am in immediate contact with the richness of this Pearl,
a delightful contact,
is my true self as Being.
Only within nothingness
could I recognize my ego mind
had cut me off from the ground of Being.
What is essential now
is no longer needing to accomplish something.
Now is with a confidence to rest in Being.
This is not a concept or a belief,
but is the direct experience of Being itself,
my origin,
my true identity as Essence.

This poem
is soul-making
and is a moment to create.
This being nothing is Essential
and is the spark in my soul,
transforming nothing into something,
a shining Void.
It is being within Presence,
being worthwhile and valuable in Presence,
creation from nothing.
The whole flow of life is becoming,
an enormous creative dance with the other,
life is one.

Finding this spark in my soul,
being one with the other in Presence,
could not be more satisfying.
This spark
is to be present,
deeply and completely,
even in being nothing.
This connection is Essential,
Presence within Presence
Being within Being,
Other within Other.

This simple faith,
to dance and rest in Being,
is a profound connection with others.
This faith in nothingness is Essential,
to be a living moment,
to love simply and genuinely.
Precious nothingness is the shining Void.
          ~ I surrender to your truth ~

 

Sydney S. Orr
Pendleton, OR